Thinking a loud

The lie - I have not been effective and successful in xxx what makes me think I can do well in xxx....

The truth - Failure doesn't define me, God does.

The reality - I'm still learning and exploring to discover what it is that God has called me to do... There is also a part of me that fears...

Due to my many failures,  I sometimes doubt my capabilities and competence and struggle to find my strength!

Being involved in differen ministries /mission trips exposes me to different gifting I never knew I had... So far, I discovered I could do prophetic art and music... Now, I'm exploring children ministry, I've already been in childcare for 11 years, I'm just expanding my "experience" in the mission field to "test" my effectiveness... Too early to say anything yet, since I just started.

After all these years, I'm still trying to find my niche, what I enjoy doing and what I'm really good at. I roughly have an idea, but to be honest, I am just average, I'm not the best or the most sought after but I just want to be available... Possibly, a way for me to explore and discover what I'm truly called for in my calling in ministry...  Different people have different opinions of me, ultimately it is God showing me and convincing me in the specific areas I should focus on...

Many failed attempts are also experiences, that I learn... Looking to see which area I've done well in and see how I can be better in it... This applies to my career too...

Reflections on Obstacles

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As I was looking at some of the situations I have encountered over recent weeks, sometimes even looking back at things I have went through over the years… I have just learnt something about obstacles that the Lord is teaching me.

Often in lives we face obstacles in many forms… One example I like to give is this, quite often on the same day or week, which I have an important church activity to attend to, I will suddenly find myself drowned with a lot of work that will cause to me be stuck at home and thus preventing me to attend it… This doesn’t happen just once or twice but it happens so many times that I have lost count of the number of events I missed just because I got stuck at home… I realised this is a trick the devil uses a lot on me… Knowing that my weakness is my work and until I have finished my work, I rarely have any peace in my mind and heart  and often I will make a lot of excuses not to go anywhere else because of it… Because you didn’t go, you miss out on the blessing God has intended for you.

Don’t you think it is too much of a coincidence if it happens almost half the time?  Every time, you have something important you want to attend to, related to church, something happens; you suddenly get into a quarrel with someone, something crops up at work, it clashes with an office event, out of the blue you fall sick…. Either for some reason you missed it, (and regret that you did, and wished you were there) or you eventually attended the meeting but with some struggles in your heart.

I remembered once I didn’t feel so good, and I was really tempted to skip church but I still pressed my way and made it to church no matter what, and I thank God that I did, because I was hungry for God, He blessed and honour me for preserving to seek Him. Sometimes, if you just give in to the excuse, you have just fallen for the trick of the enemy and you just missed out on something great that God has in stored for you.

Obstacles can come from two different sources carrying two different types of purposes. The first type of obstacles are God ordained, when God allowed these obstacles to come your way, it is either to train you for something greater or to protect from something is probably going to harm you in some ways or maybe God is just saying no because he has something else better for you. Once I was looking forward to attend a Christian concert, but many things prevented me from being able to buy the tickets and there was also a clash of events, I had classes to attend prior to that. Eventually I didn’t manage to attend it because I realised later (somewhere in the midst of it), that mom was having her birthday dinner that same evening, and God wanted me to be there instead. That’s no wonder why I was having a hard time planning and trying to get my ticket for the concert. On one hand, I didn’t know if I was able to make it after class, on the other hand I had a hard time getting my tickets online…

The other type of obstacles comes from the Devil. (Like what I have shared in my above example in the beginning) If this happens, there can only be one purpose, it is to destroy, distract and derail you away from the plans of God.

While God has a plan for you, remember that the devil also has a plan for you… John 10:10 says, “The devil comes to steal, kill and destroy, but I (Jesus) have come that you may have life, and life more abundantly.”  Whenever God has a plan for you, the devil is also working behind the scene to attempt to bring you down, so that you are not able to fulfil God’s plan.

We need to learn to discern which ones are God ordain and which ones are from the devil (which normal comes as a form of spiritual attack). How do we discern? Sometimes you just know, you can sense it, otherwise, simply go to God in prayer and ask Him to reveal it to you through the Holy Spirit.  If it comes from the Holy Spirit, you will feel peace in the end, and it is normally for a good purpose, otherwise, you would probably be able to guess that it is coming from the other side.   

The devil has a lot of tactics he uses to prevent you from doing God’s work or drawing close to Him. Sometimes, he uses your own weakness against you; sometimes, he uses the people around you. Otherwise, he will cause a situation to arise that will either; destroy, distract, defeat, discourage, delay or detour you. The Bible however  encourages us that in some situation, God has the ability to turn what the devil intend to be harmful, to be good for his purpose in the case of Joseph (Gen 50:20)

And Romans 8:28 says “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him who have been called according to his purpose”.

We can be encouraged therefore, that nothing happens to us that is unknown to God, sometimes even if is from the devil, God also has a purpose for allowing it, which we may never understand as in the case of Job.  (Job 1:6-12).

We can however be encouraged that, “If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all – how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God for justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one, Christ Jesus who died, more than that, who was raised to life – is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written; “For your sake we face death all day long, we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything things in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8: 31-39)

Be encouraged, God is always on our side no matter what happens in our lives. It is up to us, however, to choose which side we want to be on.

God bless you!

Serving with you in His Kingdom with love;

Princess Michelle –

Beloved Daughter of the Most High King

Tears of Healing

Tears are my prayers when I'm unable to speak
Lord You see my heart, You know that I am weak
Drop by drop they flow continually from my eyes
Like the rain that is falling from the sky
How loud O Lord is the sound of my cry
How long more O Lord will You continue to pass me by
Every ounce of hurt, with each tear I choose to let go
May Your healing touch through each one of them flow
Receive my tears as my worship and prayer unto Thee
Do not ignore my cries when I'm on my knees
I will continue to wait on You
Trusting Your grace to see me through
For my hope comes from You and You alone
My Abba Father, who sits on heaven's throne

Written by Michelle Yee

Hope

Give me faith when my world is crashing
Lift me up when I am falling
Lord, I'm calling out to You
I have no where else to turn to

When darkness covers me
Open my eyes and help me see
You are all that I have
And You are all that I really need

Nothing else matters
No one else will do
Help me to have faith
And truly put my trust in You

You are the light, You are my hope
You are the answer to all I need
Whatever it takes, break me
Bring me to my knees

When all else fail, Your word remains true
Hope draws me back, and I'll wait for You

Written by Michelle Yee

Serving with you in His kingdom with love;
Princess Michelle -
Beloved daughter of the Most High King

Beyond it all

http://www.facebook.com/reflectionsbymichelleyee

http://www.reflectionsbymichelleyee.wordpress.com.

Behind this smile
Hides the pain you've never knew I was in
Behind the laughter
Are tears you've never seen

Beyond the pain, my heart can bear
A yearning desire for one who will love and care
Beyond the fear, and doubt that lies within
I seek the One, whom my eyes have not seen

Though my eyes seen Him not,
My heart has felt Him near
Though many words others have said to me
His words of love and truth I hold most dear

Beyond all the struggles, I face in life
Beyond all the disappointment, I continue to fight
Beyond all the darkness, failures and human fault
Is a steadfast love I behold that fails me not

Written by Michelle Yee

Serving with you in His Kingdom with love;
Princess Michelle -
Beloved Daughter of the Most High King